Those involved at any level of rugby will know that if anything, there are few certainties in the game. At the Bears’ Cave, the Erasmus RSRC welcomed RFC Gouda. With both teams struggling to find successive wins in the season so far, the match was geared up to be a tight one. Gouda, sitting just below the RSRC in the standings, had enjoyed fewer wins in the season, but had yet to be beaten soundly by any team in the league as yet. The RSRC were coming off the back of a solid win against a numerically disadvantaged REL side, but had struggled to find consistency in their performance. The stage was set for a real battle.The game kicked off and began at a high tempo. It was Gouda to strike first, with a 35 metre converted penalty within the opening 2 minutes. Unperturbed, the RSRC hit back immediately. Managing to turn over possession directly from the restart, smart play from Berend “Magneto” Guertsen and Tom “Can we talk about this tomorrow, because I’m quite drunk?” Ten Pas, allowed for Max “and the Crystal Skull” Theunissen to bomb down the line and into the corner for his first of two tries.
It soon started to turn sour for Gouda, with the first of several serious injuries sustained during the match weakening their scrum and allowing the RSRC to capitalise in the forwards. This in turn provided a great deal of possession and ultimately space out wide, which made easy pickings for Max “It’s a team game, but remember I scored more tries” Hoogerheide, who put down his first of 4 in the game, taking his season’s tally to 13.
Gouda slotted home another penalty mid way through the first half to keep the scoreboard ticking over, but in order for Gouda to pipe down, it was up to the Uncle to step in: Pollock scored two tries successively with solid attacking support from the Victorious Lemmens and Pieter “The wife’s away, who’s up for beer?” Joosse in the build up.
It was reported that some young pretenders believed the uncle Arch was past his glory days, and was even slowing down as he approached his mid 40s – but after having scored and turned around only to see the struggling Jansen in support some distance away and panting heavily, it’s safe to say we can douse the flames of such nonsense.
To their credit, Gouda never stopped chasing the game, but efforts from gekke boy Robin Hollebrand as well as a first zumba try for Eduard “applebutt (ask Josephine)” Jansen, which was graciously handed to him by the uncle since it’s almost Christmas, put the game out of reach for the travelling side.
Not to be completely outdone, Gouda gave the visiting fans something to cheer for with a well worked try down the blind side in the closing 10 minutes. A well-deserved 5 points also came from Pieter “Adrian brody” Rexwinkel, who ghosted through the middle and showed a clean pair of heels to the chasing Gouda defence, as well as two tries in two games now for the creepily moustachioed wonder winger Langeslag. With 9 conversions from Joosse and 2 dropkick conversions from Pollock, the game ended as a convincing win for Rotterdam at the half way point of the season.
Final Score: Erasmus RSRC 1VX – RFC Gouda: 87-11 (Rotterdamned)
—Archie Pollock